Wednesday, September 5, 2012
As I celebrate Jeremiah's arrival and download millions of pictures to facebook, I'm reminded of the last five years of our journey. We began trying for children over 5 years ago. We saw a specialist when things didn't work on their own. After shots, blood draws and too many appointments, we took some time off to just enjoy time as a couple. Then with David's illness in 2009, our door was pretty well shut. Once he became healthy again, we prayed about our options. We realized it was time to begin the process of looking into adoption. We spent a year and a half trying embryo adoption with more shots and appointments, waiting and big ups and downs. We knew that God had a plan for us, but it seemed so far away and hard to get to.
Meanwhile, during the last five years I watched so many people I knew having babies and growing beautiful families. Don't get me wrong, I was happy for them and am blessed by so many children in our friend and family circle. However, I would be lying if I said I didn't shed a few (or many at times) tears at their good fortune and our losses. If you've never dealt with infertility, it's exhausting, frustrating, heartbreaking and can really put you into a downward tailspin. Especially when people ask (with good intentions, I know), "when are you guys going to have kids?" or say "everyone should be a mother." It's excruciating when hope goes away. So even though I am now one of those annoying people posting pictures daily of her sweet baby, I want to acknowledge the sadness that people are facing out there when they see another baby that isn't in their family. If you have a story like ours, I know it is a lonely battle. But know that you're not alone. We have spent many years in the "valley" waiting for it to be our turn. If you ever want to talk, I'm here. We are proof on so many levels that God is good, all the time. :) He knows the plans He has for you, plans to give you hope and a future. Our sweet Jeremiah is here to remind us of this promise, and we are forever grateful.
Saturday, August 25, 2012
So... After continually guessing, it looks like today is the day. Stephanie went into labor late Friday night and we are expecting Jeremiah anytime Saturday morning. It's almost 4:00am, and I am not tired in the least. I can't believe we are finally here. Our God has kept us in the palm of his hand, and guided our every step. More details and pictures to come. Lots and lots of pictures!
Saturday, August 18, 2012
As we reflect over this process we see how strong God's presence has been along the way. He knew this plan long before we did and it is all coming together perfectly in His timing. We rejoiced when He brought Stephanie into our lives and began putting the pieces together to add to our family. But now as it gets so close, we struggle with praying for our will instead of His! But we are human and just excited. :) So now when it really counts, we pray that we step back and "not my will, but yours be done." God knows what He's doing and is good ... all the time. (right Stephanie) ;) So please pray for the sweet baby that is on his way into this world and for the beautiful young woman who will give him life. Thank you, God, for this blessing.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
When David and I began planning for kids, we had the usual discussion of boy names and girl names. Since he is a III (3rd) we thought about continuing that tradition. He comes from Henry Davids and Harold Davids. We thought we might modernize things a bit and go with Haiden David. But, one day when we were going through our heartache with failed pregnancies and such, David felt as though God gave him a name for our son. Little did we know he would be arriving sooner than later. Well, David was reminded of my favorite Bible verse, "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord. Plans to prosper and not harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future." This verse has comforted us through the tough times that led us to this joyous occasion. The verse is Jeremiah 29:11. Thus the inspiration for our son's name: Jeremiah David Meyer :) ETA August 24, 2012
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
I remember, when I was small enough to fit there, cuddling up in the crook of my father as he was lying on his side on the floor watching tv. I was trying to lay there and watch tv just like he was. Its the first memory I have of me trying to be like him, but I am sure it isn't the first time I tried, and it certainly isnt the last.
I remember sitting in his office with him "helping" him fill out his expense reports. He spent a lot of time in memphis, and we would abbreviate memphis "MEM." My job was to right MEM, MEM, MEM, MEM across the top of the reports. At least thats the way I remember it. Honestly, I probably just sat there and talked about Mario Brothers while he did all of the work.
Speaking of it, I remember playing Mario Brothers with him all day on Christmas. We kept trying to figure out how long you could keep flower power. We had determined that you could use it for 3 fireballs. Then we learned that it just took 3 fireballs before we ran into something, that would of course rob us of our fire throwing abilities.
We played alot of sports. We would shoot hoops in the driveway. Play catch with a baseball for what seemed like hours. And my favorite... I would run a "down-out- down" route around a tree, and my dad would hit me with the perfect pass, just out of the reach of the defending tree's hands.
I thought he was crazy when he told me there was someone better for me... after Laura, after Jackie, after a different Laura, and after Allison. He was right. He's just about always right, I think I get that from him.
He has made the perfect transition from a authoritative figure in my life to a wise counsel. He is an affluent businessman, loving husband, and an amazing dad. I couldn't ask for a better role model as my child is on his way. I can only hope I can be half the dad to my son, that he was to me.
I love you, Dad.
Thursday, June 7, 2012
When I think of this verse I think of lawn bags. Have you ever been up to your elbows in leaves shoving them into the bottom of a lawn bag to try and fill it to its absolute capacity? You shake it up, and maybe even hop in and jump on it. All of this so that when you finish filling it leaves are still coming up out of the top and no one could ever close the bag. This is how I picture the blessings this verse speaks of. This is how I was blessed last night.
Financially we did very well at Buffalo Wild Wings. If you are curious, between the fundraiser itself, and donations made directly to us we raised over $1500.00 last night. This was certainly an amazing blessing, but we were blessed in ways I never saw coming.
The day started when Leah's friends from high school showed up for lunch. I am not sure where all of them lived, but I know one of them is from a little over an hour away. Then it was a couple of our friends from bible study. Then some of Leah's family (her cousins son - about 4 years old - donated $.80 to us... too sweet), from about 45 minutes away. Then it was many of my friends from the Waterford business community. I noticed a friend from church in the lobby, and suddenly there was about 15 of them all ready to eat together. They actually waited to leave for vacation so they could come support our cause. Before long, the entire room was filled with friends, family, and I even saw some of our flyers on tables for people I had never met.
As things were just getting crazy a very special young lady walked in with her parents. Stephanie, our birth mother, came with her parents to support our cause. We were able to sit with her and her family for probably about an hour and a half. We had great conversation, and they were able to meet Leah's family and some of our dearest friends.
Last night we were blessed in good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over.
Thank you so much for your support and for your prayers!
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
I get confused when I play chess, movement of my sixteenish pieces versus my competitors just becomes too much for my feeble brain to handle. The truth is... I get confused playing checkers. Our God, however, is able to perfectly maneuver the 3.5 billion lives on this planet, in addition to the innumberable people that have been here before us and are yet to come. There is nothing more beautiful, more miraculous, than seeing God's plan form before you out of what you thought was mere rubble. A great pastor once said that our lives are like mosaic tiles, all we see is one shade of a jagged ceramic, but our God sees the entire beautiful masterpiece.
When Leah and I were trying to get pregnant in 2007, He knew about her. When I moved to Chicago in 2008, He knew about her. When I got sick in 2009, He knew about her. When we found out I could never father children n 2010, He knew about her. When Leah miscarried twice, in 2011 and earlier this year, He knew about her. Tomorrow, let me say that again, because it sounds so beautiful, so miraculous. Tomorrow, we get to meet her!
Monday, May 28, 2012
- first teaching job, took a long-term substitute job teaching 8th grade math - I don't want to teach middle school!
- took only 3 weeks to get a call for a full time job teaching the same grade and subject in the district where I went to school
- 3 years later, was transferred to the elementary school teaching 4th grade - I don't know how to teach elementary school - that's 4 subjects in the same day!!
- made some amazing friends who got me through it and I'm finishing my 6th year teaching elementary school - 4th grade being my favorite grade
- living in a nice condo, but small for my taste, hoping for more - We can't put it on the market in this economy!
- plus, David got a job in Chicago in the middle of the school year - I can't leave my job halfway through!
- we ended up living apart for 6 months (hardest 6 months of my life at that point), but when he got laid off, I still had a job and we bought our dream house and rented out the condo!
- David had health complications - What if something goes wrong in surgery?
- had the surgery, something DID go wrong, God gave us a miracle and a glimpse at His power and will that I had never imagined before. David is better than ever now and it ended up being for the best (despite the fear that went along with it).
- decided to start a family - Why isn't it working? What do we do?
- tried doctors, embryo adoption, suffered losses of two miscarriages ...
But now here we sit, feeling more in God's will and timing than ever before. All of that fear was replaced with the amazing agape love of God - unconditional and unchanging. We have been given an incredible opportunity to share this crazy story with people and show God's love for us. So thanks to all these circumstances I have been taken out of my comfort zone and forced to stand up to fear and instead choose God's love. He knows what He's doing, and I just need to hang on and enjoy the ride.
Here's the message, if you want to hear it...
River Church // 3385 - Fear vs. Love
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Thank you so much for all of your prayer over the last several months, and you are not done yet! Please, please, please keep praying for us, this sweet, young mother, and her baby. I hope and pray that they are the addition to our family that we have been praying for.
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
We had a great weekend with family and friends and it makes me smile as I think about outings with a new baby. I can't wait for him or her to become a part of our extended family and grow up to play with our friend's kids. I am excited for all the possibilities that are in store and I'm ready for them to begin!
Thanks, as always, for your support through blog messages, facebook, in person, and in prayer. We look forward to seeing you at the fundraiser on June 6th if you're able to make it.
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
We also went to a "waiting families" meeting last week with several other waiting families. They had 2 adoptive couples, as well as two birth moms, and one of the dads. It was very cool to hear the different perspectives from both sides of the adoption. It was also nice to hear that several of them had the same fears we are having. We are terrified of a failed adoption. Having already miscarried twice, we don't know if we could handle the grief of an adoption that falls through. It was very nice to have the adoptive parents speak, as both couples had at least one failed adoption, and were able to speak kindly of the situation. It seems as though once you are matched and have a baby at home, all wounds are healed. I so look forward to that day.
The thought is quite crazy that we could be parents tomorrow! Realistically, the agency is estimating 12-18 months, but if a birth mother likes us tomorrow, we could be matched that quickly. Keep praying for our birth mother. This process is obviously going to be very tough for her. Also, please pray for our hearts. That he will protect our family, and make us whole very, very soon!
AND DONT FORGET ABOUT THE FUNDRAISER JUNE 6TH. PRINT OUT THE FLYER BELOW AND BRING IT WITH YOU!!!!
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Thank you for all the continued prayer. And now, the wait begins...
Monday, April 30, 2012
We also have been truly blessed this past week to receive a few large donations to our cause. It never ceases to amaze me the generosity of those that love us, and some that have never even met us. I came into the office last week to make copies of the fundraiser flyers and ran into the ladies that wash our coffee pots for us. Since I had some with me I figured I would give them a few copies. One of the ladies was even so nice to invite some friends. One of her friends is excited about our adoption and wants to contribute. She can't make the fundraiser, but wanted to know how she could go about donating. What an amazing woman! I have not, and probably will never meet her, but she has truly blessed my family! Thank you so much for all of your continued prayers for fundraising and our baby. I have a friend who recently raised money for a missions trip. She blogged several times that she had no idea where the money was going to come from, but was just trusting in God. I thought I understood how that would feel to see God work that way, but I was clueless. It is truly amazing to watch Him unfold His plans before your very eyes.
Thank you and keep praying. We will see you on the 6th... don't forget the flyer!
Monday, April 23, 2012
Also, over the weekend I talked to several people that are far out of town and wished they could come to the fundraiser, or otherwise help our cause. Our adoption worker told us about an organization called Chip In! that helpls people raise money for whatever their cause is. You can see on our toolbar on the right a "widget" for chip in. We have set an arbitrary goal of $5,000.00 however, I would be blessed if we could raise even $5.00 for our efforts. Anyway, if you are one of these people that REALLY wants to help us, and lives out of town, or otherwise can't make the fundraiser, feel free to make a donation through Chip In! Again, I feel really awkward asking for money, and please know that we will be very good stewards of any gifts, and everything will go directly to Bethany Christian Services. If you cannot or simply don't want to give, please understand there is NO, I repeat, NO, pressure, and I cannot tell who has, or for that matter who has not given, so we will not know what you choose to do. We just wanted to create an easy way for those who have the ability and desire to help.
On another note, we received our photo books from snapfish. These will be given to potential birthmothers by Bethany Christian. This is how they first get to know us, and how they decide which family they want their child to grow up in. We did as much as we could to show who we were, and are very excited by the end result. I can't believe how quickly this is becoming real!
Our next tasks are to create a YouTube video, basically a photo montage of us, as another marketing tool for prospective birthmothers. Also, we have to do about 20 hours of education on adoption, and raising adopted children.
Thank you so much for your continued prayer, please pray that our baby is out there somewhere and that He prepares a path to our meeting our child soon!
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Thank you for your continued prayers. We hope to get the flier for the fundraiser on the blog soon. Stay tuned!
Sunday, April 8, 2012
It's great to be home today as we have had a great vacation out to Las Vegas. I posted quite a few pictures on Facebook along the way and will probably be making an album soon. I wanted to make something very clear to those that are reading and those that have commited to come to our fundraiser in June. Our Spring Break trip was one that was scheduled for last August to celebrate our 5 year anniversary. We budgeted and saved to have some money to spend in casinos, on shows and other excursions long before the adoption became a reality. However, during the embryo portion of our journey, the timing of the process meant that I had to be home for a result on one of the transfers. I also had a job opportunity that I really wanted come up and the interview was the week we would be gone as well. Both were exciting possibilites, so we cancelled our trip. Unfortunately, neither were meant to be and we were left with the loss of a baby, job opportunity and great trip. It was a rough time. We also lost some money on the flight and other excursions we had booked. It was very disappointing. Fortunately, we were able to rebook our trip for this month and had a great time.
We understand the great responsibility of asking others to help us financially, though, and do not take that lightly. This was a trip that was paid for months ago and we are now saving every penny. So please understand that we are not asking others to help financially and then living the high life on vacations. :) We are scheduled to go to Hawaii in July to celebrate my best friend finishing her residency as an ER doctor. Again, this was paid for months ago and a great deal that we got. We will be vacationing on a budget when we get there. We love PB & J's!
So please know that if you are willing to help us with donations during this process, we will be good stewards of your money. Every penny that we had budgeted for this vacation that we didn't have to spend we put straight into the adoption fund. I'm telling you this because it was on my heart while we were gone and I felt convicted to do so. Half of our vacation was spent with my aunts and uncles that I don't get to see very often, and it was awesome to spend with them. David got to know them better and we were so glad we could be with them. So it was a great time and chance to recharge before going into my last marking period at school.
So thanks for letting me explain. :) Happy Easter!
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Thanks for your prayers, and we will keep you posted
We did find out recently that all of our references have been received and we are now waiting to be assigned a case worker so that we can begin our home study process. Also, as you read in the last blog we have finalized our fundraiser date, June 6th, at Buffalo Wild Wings on M-59 in Waterford. As soon as I have the fliers, I will post them here, as well as on facebook, and anywhere else I can find to put them! We are also looking into what would be required to form a non profit, tax exempt organization for our fundraising efforts. I think that if we did go as far as to form the non-profit, we would probably continue the organization after our adoption and try to write grants for other couples looking to adopt. The idea of helping others in our situation is exciting, and I almost want to go through with the non profit just for that aspect of it.
Also, I was speaking with a co-worker recently and she let me know of a young lady who is unexpectedly pregnant. She had apparently contemplated abortion and is now considering adoption. We referred her through my co-worker to Bethany Christian. I also had my co-worker give her some information about us. While it would be absolutely incredible for her to choose us, as we are just getting started, we really are praying that she does choose adoption and that the baby is saved from abortion.
Please continue to pray for us. Especially for our finances, for the confusion associated with fundraising and tax exemption, etc., for our adoption process that it can be smooth and quick. Also, please pray for the young mother I mentioned, either way that she chooses, she is in for an emotional ride. I pray that God protects her in the process. And finally, pray for our baby wherever he/she is that God will protect him/her and prepare him/her for us.
Thanks for reading!
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
The first you will see on the right hand side and bottom of this page. Google Adwords has a program called AdSense where we receive a portion of the proceeds from any clicks on our blog's advertisers. They are linked to us based on the content of the site. This morning when I looked at it is was a website for verses for your wedding, and a fertility clinic... so they do a pretty good job! Anyway, I cannot encourage you to click on them for the sole purposes of driving revenue to us, and if you do we can actually get kicked out of the program. However, if you see something that you are interested in I strongly encourage you to support our advertisers.
Secondly, Buffalo Wild Wings in Waterford on M-59 is letting us host a fundraiser. I am fairly confident that the date will be June 6th, and they will give us 20% of all of the revenues from anyone that has our coupon with them. I will be posting the coupon here, and on facebook, and linkedin, and everywhere else I can find. If you could also mark that date on your calendar, and plan on eating at BW3's on June 6th, I would really appreciate it.
I spoke with Bethany Christian Services yesterday, and they have received most of our personal references and our licensing from the state. We are just waiting on 2 of the references and we will be all set. Please continue to pray for our process, specifically that these references will make their way to Bethany, and that he will prepare a beautiful baby for us to bring home soon.
Monday, March 19, 2012
So, thank you for your continued prayer. We are truly blessed.
To live is Christ, to die is gain.
Thursday, March 15, 2012
We heard a story actually that even the people that lived in our house before us had a very similar story to ours. They struggled with infertility after having their first child and ended up adopting their second. This was a huge shock as we met the family, and their daughters could have been twins!
Anyway, since posting we have heard from so many different people from so many different areas of our lives. We have been loved on by neighboors, coworkers, family, friends, acquaintances, and even some people we hardly know. Everyone seems to be pulling for us, and wanting to help in anyway they can. We will remember you when we need a babysitter!
Yesterday afternoon, the weather was absolutely beautiful. I decided, despite anyone I told telling me I was nuts, to ride my bike to church rather than drive. It is about 10 miles, and seeing as my most active day in the last 8 months was a movie/tv marathon on a Saturday, it was more than I was ready for. However, as I was riding into church a huge smile came over my face, as I felt I had just accomplished something. I had no idea what was in store.
After reading our blog one of our good friends, and the leader of our bible study, had asked us to share our story with our group. At the end of the study, Leah and I, gave an abbreviated version of what was already hashed out in the previous posts, as well as shared our heart and our struggles. Afterwards the group gathered around us, and prayed over us. While I appreciated everyone who prayed for us, and was touched by every word that was spoken, one moment was especially moving. A gentleman and his wife showed up for the first time last night. In my opinion the only time in your life more awkward than lunch on your first day at a new school, is your first time attending a new bible study. This man came into a group that has established a fairly strong connection over the last several months, and was open with us throughout the conversation. Then as the group prayed over us, I heard his unfamiliar voice praying over us as well. A man I have never met, was kind enough to feel our pain, and hope, and offer a petition to our amazing God on our behalf.
Last night, Leah and I learned once again how wonderfully amazing our God is. Last night God came down from his throne to E. Holly Road, and gave my wife and I just what we needed. We were shown firsthand by Him what is happening for us all over the place. Many people we know and love, and few that we may not have met before are praying for us. Praying for a peace in our lives, and a baby in our home. Thank you so much to all of you who have taken the time to get on your knees for us.
In regards to an update, as anyone who has seen this process before there is a whole lot of waiting. All of our applications are in and Bethany, our adoption agency, has sent out reference letters to our personal and pastoral references. Now we are waiting on those to be filled out and returned. Once they are back in, as well as some sort of licensing from the state, we will be assigned a case worker, and the fun begins!
Thank you again for all of your prayers... and keep it up!
Friday, March 9, 2012
We will be posting here to keep you up to date as to what is happening as we progress through the adoption stages. I am sure we will be asking for alot of prayer along the way and we appreciate all of those who do pray for us.
The first week of this process has been absolutely crazy. On Monday of this week, we found out that the baby had misscarried. David filled out the preliminary application for adoption that afternoon, and we were aproved that night. This allowed us to fill out the formal application on Monday night. By about noon on Tuesday, we had received word that our formal application had been approved and that a package would be in the mail for us to complete. Instead, we were able to visit the Bethany office that day, and pick up the package in person. All night Tuesday night, we spent completing the package. We had to get a doctors clearance and fingerprints. These were David's tasks for Wednesday. We were both able to get appointments for the doctor on Wednesday, (when was the last time you got a same day doctors appointment, let alone 2?) We were fingerprinted Wednesday afternoon, and our packet was turned in on Thursday morning.
We were able to complete an application process in 4 days that when we were going through the embryo adoption process, the same application process took about 2-3 weeks.
Next, we will be assigned a case worker, and someone will come to our house, and make sure our living situation is fit for a child. This is usually one of the longer portions of the process. However, if God continues to make our path as clear as he has this week, I am sure we can get through it quickly.
Please pray for our hearts throughout this process. We know it is going to be a long and emotional one. Also, please pray that God continues to move barriers out of the way, and bring us a baby soon!
After a couple of months of horomone therapy, Leah's body was ready to receive her first set of embryos. Three embryos were thawed, and two survived the thawing process. Both of these two were transfered, but neither implanted into her lining, and thus we did not get pregnant.
After about a three months we went through the process again, with some minor tweaks. this time 4 embryos were thawed, and all of them survived! Three of them were transferred and one was refrozen for future use. After the longest 12 days of our lives we received good news. We were pregnant. This happened right at about the same time as October was setting in. We told many of our close friends who had been praying for us throughout the process, took pictures of Leah holding mums.... get it... mums... and after about 10 days of excitement we were shocked again. The baby had miscarried. We never knew how attached you could grow to someone you had never met. Also, we had the looming fear that we only had one more chance.
A couple months later, we go for the process a third and final time. If you have done your math, we have two embryos that we haven't touched and one, now called a blastocyst, that has been refrozen. The human body is so complex that it cannot receive embryos at different ages, or even into a womb that is expecting embryos of a different age. The clinic thawed out the two embryos and grew them out until they were the same age as the blastocyst. Unfortunately the blastocyst did not survive the thaw, and one of the other embryos died in the early stages as well. We transfered one embryo. Then we waited. Then we heard we were pregnant. This time we were a little more careful with who we told, and kept it to only people who absolutely needed to know. We didn't even tell our parents. Unfortunately, things started to look all to familiar, as Leah misscarried about a week into the pregnancy.
This time the pain was less about the baby, but more about the opportunity loss. We have come to the realization that Leah will not be pregnant. We are confident that God has designed us to be parents. But, perhaps he has intentions for us not just to save a baby. Perhaps, he also wants us to affect the life of a young mother as well. We have decided to pursue traditional, domestic infant, adoption.
After being laid off from the bank, and returning to Michigan, many of you know this is when David had all of his medical issues. If any don't know, David had some major complications to surgery, and spend 40 days in the ICU. He woke up to find that he had kidney failure, two pulmonary emboli, sepsis, not too mention he had lost just about all of his strength. He could not even lift his arms to touch his face. Needless to say, it was a long journey back, but in March of 2010 was when David really started to look and act like himself again. Today, David is pretty much back to normal. His kidney's have fully recoverd, as have his lungs, his heart, and just about everything else... just about... One of the few remnants of David's complications is that he will never be able to father children. Enter Phase 3